All the Way from Teluk Intan

Orang kata bila kita di rantauan, mudah sungguh kita lupa kampung halaman. I guess it is true to a certain extent, especially for those who called themselves orang bandar. You might argue that one case is no case at all, but for me, one case is already a good example. In my flat, there are 3 Malaysians (of different ethnicity each), including myself. The others are Asians, but not Malaysians. I want to describe to you what I feel about them, which is obviously from my personal observation.

Seorang makcik ni memang kaki kalut. She can be kepoh at times, but most of the times, dia suka lepak in her room. She says she'll get headaches if she were to watch TV at the living room. As such, she likes to watch DVDs in the room. She's kind of nice, though she can be fickleminded. I know she comes from a well-to-do family, punya family business di Kompleks Aik Aik tu. Yet, she takes good care of herself, and the things around her. Berjimat cermat dah memang cara dia, and bersih. What she does in her room is totally personal, but overall, I like her, and I can tolerate her. Dan dia datang dari Jalan Laksamana, who would have thought that I get to meet my orang kampung here. She respects our differences in religion and dia selalu tanya if it is of offense if she were to take something, like her ba alif ba ya. And interestingly, for a Chinese, dia suka translate her ideas from BM into English, kadang-kadang kelakar, hehehehe ... Dalam erti kata lain, dia ni memang nyonya. Pantang bab-bab duit ni, tapi tak menyakitkan hati. Dia buat kerja dia, kita buat kerja kita. Lurus bendul gak, patuh pada regulations.

Lagi seorang makcik tu, nampak cool all the time. Maklumlah dah setahun setengah in Perth. Badannya cekeding, tapi lagaknya kalah Mak Limah TESL. Kononnya datang dari bandaraya KL, dan nampak gayanya macam datang dari family yang senang. Ada sedara mara di seluruh Ivy Leagues di dunia ini. Mungkin la agaknya, I never asked. Yang aku tahu, dia pernah cerita yang dia telah melancong ke beberapa negara luar. Aku ingat lagi, dari hari pertama aku jejak kaki ke flat ini, dia dah bercerita not only to me, but also to my parents that dia dalam process nak memohon jadi warganegara di sini. That's funny, isn't it ... katanya hidup di sini tak sama macam di Malaysia. Cakap dah lah very the orang putih, gaya tak perlu lah cerita, kawan baik cum penasihat memang orang putih, cuma dia saja yang tak berapa putih... hehehehehe. Umur muda, baru 21, betul ke keputusan dia tu? When I come to view it, teruk sangat ke Malaysia tu? Bagus sangat ke negara orang putih ni, sampaikan tak sabar-sabar dia nak pulang, dan datang semula untuk menggenapkan 2 tahun tinggal di sini? Agak pengotor orangnya dalam bergaya tu, pinggan mangkuk dibiar berendam berhari-hari, bila masak tu, kurang mahir bab cuci mencuci. Katanya, masa dengan flatmates dari Spore & Amerika, semuanya cincai belaka. Tak siapa kisah sekotor mana. hehehehe, itu lah penangannya terlalu asyik dan kagum dengan barang orang, sampai barang sendiri dicampak pergi. Yang lagi peliknya, dua-dua makcik ni pangkalnya orang Malaysia, pergi sekolah di Malaysia (seorang di bandaraya glamer, seorang lagi di Horley Methodist), makan nasi, minum air cap Malaysia, membesar bersama rakan dari kaum berlainan bangsa. Tapi, seorang masih takut-takut dan percaya dengan apa yang dibawa dari Malaysia, lagi seorang dah jauh pergi, tak sedar lagi agaknya. Rugi saja Malaysia bagi kad pengenalan pada dia.

I pray not to see myself becoming like that, Insyaallah. Well, each of us is entitled to our own life. Aku bangga punya kampung, walaupun yang dulunya selalu banjir, walaupun hanya ada Fajar dan Billion., Mastan Ghani, kacang rebus gemuk, cucuk ngan popiah, gulai tempoyak ikan keli, sambal machang, beriyani Ghulam Rasul dan jam tinggi yg semakin senget tu? Kalau ada pun, tak kan sama dengan yang original. We always think that education and exposure can liberate one's mind to be open to the differences in others' lifestyles and beliefs. But in actual sense, one might get rather very obsessessive in embracing the so-called "better" lifestyle, only too embarrassed to admit that she or he already has one. Acquiring another culture and lingo does not guarantee that your life ahead is better. And how sure can you be - of being accepted as one of them? I asked because I feel that makcik is so carried away with the PR thingy, that is yet to be applied next year. Hebat sungguh penangan nak jadi MACAM orang putih ni, kadang-kadang nak gelak pun ada. You should come here and see for your own. She parades herself as being so westernised, indirectly indicating to us her own set of superimposed ideas and meanings in life. Here's from me lurve, get a life! There's more outside there than just dreaming to become an orang putih, in which they themselves are not like that. Mungkin dia tak ada kampung, jadi dia tak tau apa itu setia. Entah lah ... mungkin agaknya


http://www.molon.de/galleries/Malaysia/TelukIntan/img.php?pic=4
http://ms.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teluk_Intan

Pada Waktu-waktunya

Kalaulah gelisah membelah
tenteram dadamu
teguh-teguhkanlah
langkah perkasamu
membenamkan duka
di jalan terbuka.
Kalaulah sepi meningkah
hayat kudratmu
cekal-cekalkanlah
lelah relamu
melemparkan risau
di angin pulau.

Kalaulah hampa mencecah
pinta sentosamu
tenang-tenangkanlah
gementar hatimu
bagai musafir
mengucup takdir.

(Dharmawijaya, 1981)

*I found this beautiful poem when I was browsing through Arbak Othman's discussion on The Innate Structure of Culture In Dharmawijaya’s Poems: A Unified Theory of Description. It has touched me in a way that I cannot describe ...

Terima Kasih

I celebrated my hari jadi all alone yesterday, the way I chose it to be. Nothing special, nothing fancy, no cakes, no friends, no loved ones (except for letting go of the fire alarm in the flat when I was frying the ikan merah). I wanted to keep it to myself, just for myself. I guess I have mellowed as much through the years, and I do find contentment in doing what I want and what I like most. This list is endless, but when I reflect on what I have had through out the years of my life, these are the ones that matter most to me.

1. I am thankful to God the Almighty for bestowing me with good health and a healthy mind to walk on the face of this planet
2. I am thankful to have my Mak and my Bapak who love me very much, who support me in every move that I make, and who are always willing to sacrifice anything for the sake of my well-being and my happiness
3. I am thankful to have all the memories that I can keep with me of my Opah and my Tuk since the day I was born till the day I was left to be on my own, for which I shall forever hold close their endless belief and love in me
4. I am thankful to have been brought up in Teluk Intan, one very insignificant, small outdated place to others, but one biggest, most special home to me regardless where I have been or where I am
5. I am thankful to have been given opportunities upon opportunities when I thought I was really at the bottom-end of my life, when I thought giving up was the only solution I have in hand
6. I am thankful to have gone through the bitterweet moments of knowing I have felt deeply for someone though I know I would never be able to be with him
7. I am thankful to have (some) family and relatives whom I know I can always depend on
8. I am thankful to have friends who really care for me, who really stand by me, through my ups and my downs, through all my temperaments and all my dreams
9. I am thankful to have led a life that that has brought me to where and who I am now (academically, professionally & personally)
10. But most of all, I am thankful to be just who I am

My Mak called to wish me Selamat Hari Jadi and my Bapak said always look forward and don't turn back anymore. He has hoped that every day of my life is a wonderful one.

Thank you.

Sand, Sea and Surfers

There was no regret in getting up early today,ie. early by my standard. Lolly and I took a trip to Cottlesloe - finally. We reached Cottlesloe (located in West Perth, I think) at 11.30am. Luckily, we chose to walk by the beach first before going to the town of Cottlesloe, as we later found that most shops were closed today (except for the makan places). The Cottlesloe beach is just wonderful, and the weather was really lovely. I think I like the beach in Cottlesloe better than the one in Freo. Since this is just the beginning of spring, not as many were at the beach. But you could sense the "feel-good" mood around you - you know - young couples having picnic with their babies, a grandson walking with the grandmother, owners taking their dogs out for a walk, parents taking their kids for an outing, a group of tourists taking pictures, OZ men and women sun basking, lovebirds revealing their innermost feelings (maybe ) a lonely man in seluar bunga-bunga jogging, gals and boys enjoying themselves playing frisbee, persistent (novice) surfers trying to get a ride on the wave, sexy looking surfer dudes, 8 hot-looking blokes playing volleyball - hehehehe ... it felt really good. We strolled along the beachline. I picked some seashells while Lolly enjoyed herself playing with the water. It felt like a very long time since my last stroll back in Pantai Puteri, Klebang. But this time it was different. I used to go for long walks at the beach whenever I need some space to think or whenever I need to be sure of the decisions that I made. I remembered my last walk at the beach. It was when I need to decide about my coming to Australia. There is always this great sense of serenity that I felt when I am at the beach. I felt so much at ease with myself. Today's walk at Cottlesloe put me back into that frame of mind - that I am finally letting myself loose. It felt so satisfying. We later had lunch on the grass, facing the sea. The scenery was really beautiful. I had kebab (sedap) and Lolly had chicken burger (which she said was salty, and without cheese, hehehe). We "tapau" the food from one side restaurant called the Cott. And we also had 2 uninvited yet avid visitors joining us - 1 good seagull and 1 selfish seagull - that's how I named them. They were waiting for us to share our lunch with them, and we did . While waiting for the bus, we saw one Cessna aircraft circling in the air. It had a banner and it read - Tracey, will you marry me? Scoob - It was soooo romantic ... hey, I am not being mushy-mushy, but you don't get to see a marriage proposal in the sky everyday, do we? We then took the train back to Perth, but later decided to stop over at Subiaco. I like Subiaco too. Subi has a lot of makan places and cafes, and the market was what I like most. It's like the market in Freo - there's flowers, clothes, accesories, reflexology centres, etc. etc., but the best ones are the ones in the wet market. The fruits and veges are fresh and aplenty. The stalls were crowded with people getting their weekly supplies I suppose. Most carried with them their own trolleys & boxes. The fruits, for instance, were really cheap as compared to Coles'. I bought some nougats, walnuts, china dates and strawberries. I bought some fish too - this time not the fillets or the cutlets. It's the whole fish. I was practically smiling from ear to ear ... I have survived on fish this far, and shall be too delighted to have something other than salmon and mackerel. And bananas for Lolly, as usual. We reached home at 5.30pm and had a really good dinner. Gosh, I cannot describe my appetite now. It's like I can eat a horse! This is horrifying! Australian Idol was the next agenda, until everybody decided to call it a day. Ok lah, tata for now. Till the next posting, selamat malam.

G_L_o_o_M_Y and the Complaints

I am posting this from my workstation. It was slightly cloudy this morning, but not as stormy as the past couple of days. So I took a slow walk to the uni. - a pleasant one after 3 days "hibernating" in the flat. Yup, I didn't go to the uni for 3 days, but hey I spent hours on reading in the room you know. I managed to complete a number of articles for my next dateline, and thought I'd just pop into the workstation and do some work.

As usual, the moment I reached the workstation, I exchanged greetings with Sophie and Amin. Marc is not around and so does Sayfol. Sophie asked how I was doing and I said I am fine. And Amin asked the same too and mentioned that it has been cold this last few days. Well, me ... being me ... replied that it has been gloomy for me. I told him that I didn't quite like the wet weather here as it really made me gloomy. Ok fine, we always have heavy downpours in Malaysia too, but I was NEVER gloomy because of rain. But here, with the storm, the rain and the chill, they simply don't help at all. Plus I am very prone of getting sick in this kind of weather. I was coughing for the last 4 weeks and it took me not quite a while to get better, and I certainly do not plan to fall sick again.

Right, that was not that I wanted to say actually. Ok, Amin pointed out that I always like to complain. He said I like to complain about "small things" like the gloomy weather! What a f****** statement! I told him flat that the interpretation of the word "gloomy" is subjective. Surely my saying the wet weather is making my day gloomy is of no effect to him, right ... or did it? He said - that is the problem with researchers - "they" like to make "small things" look "big". Well, that was the first overstatement that I've ever had since I arrived here. Welcome to Perth mate! Life isn't always bright and sunny ok, and I happen to be just one of those who gets easily ticked off when some blanket statements are thrown to me about my personal being. Ok, I was pissed off because this isn't the first time he made such a remark. He once pointed out to me bluntly that I am just being "too hard" on my work here, ie. my studies. That I need to take things less seriously and enjoy. He might have all the time in the world, but not me.

I do things according to my way and I do not like to meddle into one's life. Thus, I'd expect the same from other people too. It's either he enjoys being overly critical, or simply because I have become so great a distraction to him! Hahahahahahaha ... Who does he think he is? He barely knows me, and he says that I like to complain??? I can do that one very well, not that I can't. How??? Like these:

• He has now made it a habit to invite all his "konco" to come to our workstation here and make it as if it is theirs. Christabel with her loud "annoucement' of her appearance in the room, and there's another man whom I am not bothered to ask for his name. And you know what, they have just made their grand entrance to the room now! Duhhhhhhh ... I so do not want to sound very sceptic or discriminating, but they simply can be so "kampunggggg"! I come from the kampung too, but at least, my kampung has taught me how to behave di rumah orang ...
• To make it worst, they even talk in their own language - very loudly - without being considerate of others in the room. I always regard my workstation here is a conducive place for me to do my work like when Zi and Istvan were still around. Everyone respects each other's space. That is, not until these two "zombies" came in! So much of being "polite" huh! The weird part is that, they only do that when I am around, not when Marc or Sayfol is in. And that is another reason why I chose to stay in the flat for the lst 3 days - to have some peace when I am concentrating on my readings!
• And not to mention that he was making passes at me too! Ohhh yeaahhh, he did that. There were a few instances that saw he was trying a bit too hard - sorry mate, I am not interested! There was this one time when he was so keen in introducing his people's music to me, and was purposely reaching for my hand on the mouse many a time, hell I brushed him off! And of his dancing in front of me, ohhhh plssssss! He failed - if he wants to know whether he has succeeded in "getting to me". I might have deprived myself of larger social circle or social life for that matter, but obviously not this kind.

I say, this is one piece of "complaint" about being complained. What a day! Miss Gloomy signing off ...

The Storm in My Heart

I have not gone to the uni. for 2 days. It's been very stormy for the past few days and the wind was howling like nobody's business. Last night it even sound eerie . What a spring! This is my first spring here in Australia, and I really look forward to see the flowers bloom. I watched on TV quite recently about the Araluen Botanic Park here in Perth. Maybe I should just take a trip to the Park. I must see the many colored tulips that they have there. I saw some in the city, but I sure wish to see them at closer look. I received a card and a present from my Mak and Bapak today. My birthday is coming up soon. Carole from the office called me to pick up the parcel. Nothing beats the feelings of getting parcels from them, although I know they could be just mere medicines or vitamins. Hehehehe, it felt like a kid again. When I was small, I really couldn't wait for my birthday presents, though I have never asked for any. I was brought up never to ask things from others. Therefore, if you were to get any, you can imagine the delight in me. That has not changed much, I suppose there's still this little kid in me... not to mention of my keeping of Che' Matt, my best buddy . So, this is the first birthday abroad, far from my family and friends. My mum will usually prepare the beriyani and my other favourite dishes on my birthday and my Dad's. And this year, they sent me a bottle of perfume, of which is one of my favourite too. I am so happy ... But there will be no beriyani ... no Mak & Bapak ... I sure miss having them around...especially on my birthday

FIVE Cargo Pants!

FIVE cargo pants, can you imagine that?!! I bought 5 cargo pants yesterday at Westfield Carousel and today, I am still sitting on the thoughts of how inappropriately I have spent. Well, yes, I do have the money allocated for that, but it was a bit out of way, wasn't it? Five, you know, not one, not two, not three, not four, but FIVEEEE!!!! In actual reason, I have been thinking on getting a pair of jeans - ONE pair only. And now, I ended up with 3 pairs of carduroy cargo pants and 2 of the cotton denim, so much for the resoulution of not to spend unnecessarily, and worstill, my wardrobe now looks --> that should explain it! But hey, I got them all for half of their original $$$$ . No..no..no.., still I shouldn't have become such an impulsive buyer! And the earrings too, gosh, whatever did I buy it for! Not that I don't have any with me, nor am I putting it on now to the uni... I have never learnt my lesson, haven't I? Ok, okkkkk .... I feel real bad now - guilty as charged!

By the way, Lolly and I ended up waiting for the bus 1 hour before we got to know that we waited at the wrong bus stop. By the time we reached the "correct" bus stop, the next bus scheduled was at 8.20pm (that was like quarter to 6). Lolly said her feet were killing her, hehehehe, it was her cowgal boots actually, hehehehe. So, we took a long ride to the city and reached home somewhere near 8pm. I did enjoy the ride though. The bus passed through 2 different zones, coming out at the Kwinana Fwy. I think we passed through East Perth, maybe, and the Southlands Boulevard, that one is definite. They also have some kind of a mall there, with a cinema too. We reached the bus port in the city close to 7, and had some Doritos. It wasn't that bad eh Lolly... except for my buying that 5 cargo pants . I know I'll be brewing on this for some time, so pls. bear with me ok. Catcha later.